I coulda played a Cuddlesome

I remembered reading in Doctor Who Magazine about a new release of comics, made just for American audiences. The concept art, of which they showed a little, reminded me of some of the art from Pocahontas, oddly enough. Then last week I was in a comic shop and what should I find but this new release, titled (rather dully) Doctor Who #1. It’s a slim volume, written by Gary Russell (who will never find himself out of work), with drawings by Nick Roche.

It’s a Tenth Doctor and Martha story and simplistic enough, but it has charm. I don’t know how I feel about the drawing style. While the guy’s clearly got talent, the drawings of the Doctor and Martha don’t particularly look like the Doctor and Martha. That probably isn’t a fair criticism to make, since even the comics in DWM haven’t particularly looked like the actors. I think the artist must have a nose fetish, as every character’s nose is rather too prominent. On the other hand, there are some cute touches—the bar where the Doctor takes Martha to get the universe’s best chocolate milk shakes looks rather Mos Eisley Cantina. And there’s a shot of the Doctor’s 500 Year Diary, last seen in Doctor Who the Movie. According to this (if it’s canon) the Doctor and Martha have been to the 1950s (didn’t it make him miss Rose?), Costa del Centauri VI, and pre-Cortez Tenochilán (wasn’t he in danger of running into himself?). There’s also the return of an old villain, but I won’t say who.

Yes, overall, this comic (which must be the first in a long series, if it goes to plan) is rather impressively drawn. Curiously enough, the first page is devoted to a quick catch-up on Gallifrey: "But there was a war, a terrible, devastating war, which they were party to . . . and in one second, Gallifrey, the Time Lords, a many planets, systems, and galaxies were consumed." There’s even "Sound of Drums"-based art, including a young Time Lady. It was a little on the expensive side at $3.99, but I must admit I keep flipping through the pages because it’s excellent education for a comic book artist-in-training (me).

Also at the comic book shop I got the March issue of DWM, about a week earlier than I normally get it. In it was the yearly freebie Big Finish CD, and since this is the first one of these I had acquired, I was very eager to listen to it. It’s my first Peter Davison audio, and while the last eight tracks or so were devoted to teasers for Big Finish’s newest releases, the fact that they’ve actually lost subscribers since the New Who makes me want to buy a subscription more than ever. If only I were rich. I’ve absolutely loved the audios I’ve bought so far, and each one is very instructive on writing for radio/audio, which if I were lucky enough to choose my career, would be the thing I’d want to do for the rest of my life (or the next twenty years anyway).

Some spoilers

Anyway, on to Cuddlesome, written by Nigel Fairs. I was a bit unenthusiastic about the premise: cuddly toys from the 1980s that attack people (like Furbies or Gremlins?). For some reason it made me think of my friend Katie, who I’ll have to pass this CD on to. I was surprised with the story, which is both simple enough to fit in 45 minutes or so, but complex enough to keep one’s interest. I was really impressed with the audio engineering. There’s a point at which two types of animated toys fight each other to the death, along with South Park-like singing, which seems absurd and is absurd, but is beautifully, wonderfully achieved through sound.

Peter Davison was very good, even if he does sound older (the first thing my mom said was, "It doesn’t sound like him!"). It helps that he’s been written very, very well. I laughed so many times I lost track. In order not to alienate some fans who may not have heard or seen any of the adventures of Five, Big Finish decided to dispense with his companions (who, on the audios, have been Peri, Nyssa, Erimem, Turlough, and once, Tegan) and bring in a one-off woman, Angela Wisher. As played by Roberta Taylor, she’s excellent too—she’d make a good companion. Older, though not quite Evelyn’s age, she appears in the first scene with her much younger boyfriend John (who’s in his skivvies apparently). She’s also a plumber, which yields some great moments. (They had a woman plumber on Ten Years Younger, so I believe it’s possible!)

Oh, the worlds of sound: the opener introduces you to a news report that Angela and John are watching on TV, but it also goes live to the actual reporter, Miranda Evenden, and can achieve that just by means of changing the flanger and echo effects on whatever program they’re using to mix. That’s snazzy, in my opinion. It also keeps the listener from getting bored. We’re also introduced quite early to Mr. Turvey, who’s a wonderful character in my opinion. He’s a children’s show host mixed with John Milton. I kid you not. To say much more would give the plot away, but I believe him, and I feel sympathy for him. The Cuddlesomes themselves, which are said to resemble pink vampire hamsters, are both revolting and cute. I thought they were more cute than revolting, however. Then again, I’ve never been attacked by one. Hats off to Kate Brown, who plays both Miranda Evenden and the Cuddlesomes. Also to Matthew Noble, who plays John and the "New" Cuddlesomes (I agree with Mr. Turvey—they’re repulsive—but satirical.) David Troughton, who I watched without realizing it in "The Curse of Peladon," makes a scary villain as The Tinghus, but again, I’d be revealing too much if I said more. With just a cast of eight, an intriguing story is brought to life.

What I always forget about sound is how, to me, when people are killed or tortured on audio (and amazingly, I’ve heard enough of these scenes in my short career of listening to audio/radio!), it’s more difficult to bear than seeing it on TV (that is if you’ve got a good performance). When the Cuddlesomes are being destroyed, it’s terrible stuff to listen to, even if they are infecting teenagers and causing them to go into hospital. Amazingly, it’s also fairly visual, as when the Doctor and Angela come in on the scene of Cuddlesome devastation—they flip a switch and I can see the singed fur and green goo in my mind. Now that’s effective audio. My one criticism is that the climax came too quickly; that was a bit sloppily done.

Then the advertising began, and I didn’t really mind, because it was the dulcet tones of Paul McGann. Swoon.

Maybe if they won’t hire me to write for Big Finish, I can play a Cuddlesome on Revenge of the Cuddlesomes?